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ohmygod, ohmygod, ohmygod...in, like, less than 4 hours i am meeting the head of the history graduate department! did i say, like, OHMYGOD!?! it is to meet 'n' greet, for him to officially approve my course selection (approooove it, dammit!) and to discuss the potential topic for my Major Research Paper, which will now be commonly referred to as Succubus. might as well name her now, as i'm sure i'll be doing a lot of ranting.

i am running on autopilot right now. i just spent the past hour cleaning up the deck (after doing my laundry - FINALLY) which contained a few ripped garbage bags of rotting clothes and books, courtesy of the boy whose room i took. yeah, that was a fucking disgusting affair - and i only had the bright idea of putting plastic bags on my hands about 3/4 of the way into it. i also had the bright idea of putting a plastic bag over my head, too, but i'm sure i'll have time for that later...

the smell was just brutal. it's been storming for the past few days, after excessive humidity. take some really rank laundry - let's say, oh, hockey gear - soak it with a hose, and leave it for 2.5 months. then inhale the fragrant aroma that is Rot! mmm, Rot, by Calvin Klein. you can't wash the unique scent away.

and books - who knew that books would go all slimey? well, paper *is* organic...thank god i've had lots of training in the Produce Army for this. i can stick my bare hands into boxes of rotting lettuce and not bat an eyelash. i don't LIKE doing it; it's not my idea of a GOOD time or anything, but it CAN be done now.

i'm doing this in preparation for Landlady Inspection. something that i think they are supposed to do, but i will coax. i need her to clean this place up - for me - as any good landperson would do for a new tenant. but because i don't know my rights or how it's done, i'm getting very ulcerous about it. about being shafted.

OH, and to cap it all off, i went back to the old apartment on saturday night (after an exhausting 12 hour shift) and started taking cds, books, shoes off shelves. i was surprised at the lack of denting this effort made, but apparently socks was surprised a different way. she was at her parents for the weekend, and it was a bit of a hit for her arriving home to my efforts. so i got an email telling me such, and once again i am blindsided by my inability to Do The Right Thing, EVER. i missed my appointment with fred last week...i think he's on vacation....WHY DO YOU PICK SUCH INOPPORTUNE TIMES, MAN?

for fuck's sake. i need the Hands Of God to drop down out of the sky and slap me around or something. give me a right good beating so that all of this mental shit is numbed.