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my hoodie was laying in the sun. putting it on was like wrapping myself in that solar warmth...

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i feel incredibly fat today. my stomach is jutting out, folding under my terrible posture. dishes on the kitchen counter rattle as i approach, 150 lbs slamming against the floor with every step. i'm picturing the Stay-Puft Marshmallow Man in my head...it's making me cringe.

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a bank machine ate my card last night. it didn't just EAT it...that bastard choked on it! it was "processing [my] request" for about 5 minutes, and then just blacked out. the next 15 minutes were spent re-booting, making various squeaks and beeps, and then popping up a screen that said "temporarily out of order" bastard bastard machine.

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socks and i saw fred together last night. we discussed the blood-taking incident a bit more, and fred said, "you know...i happen to be very good at taking blood..." (at which point socks freaked out and plugged her ears) "...in med school, people musta thought i was a heroin addict; i used to let my friends practice on me!" yeah, my shrink is a freak.

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socks, hopalong, and i had sushi last night. i out-ate the both of them. i was a raw fish fiend last night.

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i've been eating cranberry almond crunch in copious amounts. i wolf down at least two bowls every morning. cereal, fat-free soy milk, and a diet coke...ahhhh! what a way to start the day...at 12.30.

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after we left the sushi place, we walked by the local concert club. there was a large tour bus parked out front, and being the celebrity-whore that i am, i checked the listings posted outside to see who was playing. it was mojave 3, and socks and hopalong said "huh?" so i said "mo-HAAAvay three! mo-HAAvay three!" and they said "huh?" so i turned and said "MO-JAYVE THREE!" just as some ticket-holding fans were going inside. one guy said "mo-haaavay three, man!" no! no! i know that! i just hang with dumb people who don't! my worst fear is being mistaken for the idiot i am portraying.

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most exciting thing of recent days besides the whole girlfriend-collapsing-hot paramedic-incident? lady speed stick has new "flavours" as i like to call them, scents - and i bought PEACH. the "baby powder scent" always makes me gag...

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gotta go get a new bank card.