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frig fuck shit scheisse kurwa aaaiiiishiba and all swearwords inbetween

this diary's privacy has been given up!

not that i was writing like no one was reading anyway. no no. i was trying to be sassy for somebody. anybody. i don't explain to myself in my own diaries that i'm taking these specific classes, or that i'm this kind of loser. i already *know* that stuff.

i just can't be anonymous...i really can't, it's the exhibitionist in me. i had/have (still have but haven't written anything new for it) a ranting raving page which was meant to be a forum for me to get anything off my chest, but my chest is for everyone, i'm afraid. boobies for all!

come get your boobies.

*sigh*

and now what have i done? i've repaid the favour. given up someone else's anonymity (this isn't the first time. i'm such a lurking troll lurk lurk sniff smell lurk some more and hello! what's this? your privacy? gimme! *snatch*)

so webnazi, i founds ya. i's sorry. i didn't mean to. well, i actually wasn't *looking*. it really did just trip me up. maybe you've got good pr. in fact, that IS the problem. and now i'll know you better than you'll know me. and i know that scares you. how do i know? (see "i'll know you better than you know me" line)

for a webcommunity of like a billion diaries, it sure does get kramped and kozy in here...

and hey. maybe this will inspire me to let go of my privacy even more (because of course, being an exhibitionist, i can set the limits. show the boobies but not the nippies.) and be a little more honest.

wow, here's a start. i have so much shame wrapped around me. not a lot of people know that.

and it's well-deserved shame. i do shitty shitty things, mostly related to that ol' privacy-lurking-troll alter ego thingy i've got happening. i'm not sure why.

i told dr. katz (not his real skanky name) that it was our family's means of communication, snooping. we didn't have to talk to each other; we just went through each other's drawers. it's how i found out about smoking, sex, infidelity, thai massage parlours, slavic housewife porn...but those are all entries unto themselves, i'm sure you'll agree.

and yes, it frightens me. i have precious few obsessions left in life, and these snoops, peeks, prods - they feed the little monster inside of me.

oh how people would get mad and hurt! and how they should...but maybe that's the lesson i'm trying to teach myself in all of this. you have to be ABSOLUTELY PRIVATE, leave no clues, nothing out in the open, unless you are just asking for a-hurtin'.

so i will just leave no opportunity for infiltration.

i will give you what i deem appropriate.

and that is that.