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i was on hiatus.

i had a lot of things i wanted to say, but felt far too overwhelmed to say them. the soap opera of my life is, as always, written by hollywood hacks who don't know how to string a sentence together.

last week was gawdawful. they put my poor dog ben to sleep, and though i "worked through" all of that, i still cried when i heard the words on my answering machine.

i had to get my bike wheels repaired again, replacing the worn-out tires. this set me back another $60 (bike repair total: $100) - it rode like a freakin' dream, and then the next morning, i saw that the front tire was flat. this meant that the repair place obviously missed the inner tube's leakiness, so i planned to take it in the next day. uhh, i couldn't do that, because the NEXT morning - there were no wheels. half of my bike was MISSING. i walked to school, my face contorting with shock and rage and sadness - at this point, i didn't care that i was crying in public (one of my long-standing 'ishoos'). i felt so fucking defeated by it all. then i had a presentation to give in my seminar class, which i bombed royally. many many periods of silence while i, cherry red and burning, flipped through the pages of the book, shaking my head saying "i just didn't understand it..." NOT A GOOD WEEK!

but anyway. it's over. new week. new new new shiny new. arrrrgh.