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oh good god. something is terribly wrong with me and this regressing.

i have been trying to read and study all morning, but i've been too restless - obsessed with my outfit, my hair, my skin...and this e-mail to The Professor. surely he thinks i'm an idiot - i said i would drop off the photocopies yesterday, and i didn't...agggggggghhhh just pour sulfuric acid into my stomach and get this whole thing over with, ok?

so i decided that i wouldn't be at ease with anything until i checked my email. and there it was. the heavens opened up and angels sang. i muttered "come on, come on...." as the screen opened....

...only to reveal another mass email from The Professor to the class, saying that he hadn't received many photocopies (uhhh, don't look at me) so everyone should get them in today.

oh god. i'm such an idiot.

BUT! oh, man - my name is first on his mass email list. heartjumpingintothroatatthemeaninglesscoincidence.

*sigh*

i don't know. if i'm this reTarTed now...it's really incredible. there has been little else on my mind. maybe that's what i'm doing this for - i was desperate for a distraction, and whoops, there happens to be a hot intellectual distraction! this will probably help me acheive those pesky weight-loss goals. hopefully the pressure will coax some of my most intelligent academic work from me. or i will just reduce into a bumbling idiot. that is more likely.

jeezus, something ELSE happen to me, please! this will be ALL i write about now. maybe i should just buy a pink book with a lock in order to express my shameful Love Thoughts.

i will not let this become a forum for shameful Love Thoughts!!

lust thoughts? maybe.